May The Odds Be Ever In Your Favor

Imagine you were told today,

Death would come sooner that just some day.

Imagine your heart skipping a beat,

Cancer had struck and you felt defeat.

Imagine a hand reaching out to hold,

Offering love, friendship, and strength to be bold.

Imagine a Mother ready to fight,

Two boys who needed her, she couldn't die that night.

Imagine a nurse who was now the patient,

Her friends and her family would be her inspiration.

Imagine a year since the news that day,

And YOU will know the power when God's children Pray.

I think we are all guilty of waiting and hoping for someday in the future when our lives will be different. When we have the time...the money...the right moment! We wait to pursue our hopes, goals, and dreams. For many of us, someday never comes. We just continue to postpone our lives waiting for that perfect time in our lives. We become consumed with the worries of tomorrow, the regrets of yesterday, and how busy we are today. We miss out on the very moment, the only day we are promised, to change our lives ... TODAY! We miss today. Full of opportunities to touch and inspire others around you. To remember without regret. To live fully self-expressed.

I promised myself one year ago that I wouldn't just look at life differently, I would also live differently. I took time to notice things that before would have gone on the "Later" list. I've cried, hurt, feared, screamed, laughed, healed, challenged, loved and celebrated.

 Cancer taught me about TODAY.

I've learned that today is the day to say "I love you."

Today is the day to tell someone "I appreciate you more than you will ever know"

Today is the day to say, "I'm sorry, will you forgive me" and today is the day to "Forgive"

Today is the day to forgive yourself, to let go, to love life.

Today is the day to stop and count your blessings.

TODAY it is my hope that your life will be forever changed. Today is the day I hope you remember. When looking back on your life, to say, "THAT was the DAY"!!!  That was the day I started living differently. That was the day I started living my life to the fullest... no matter where ... no matter the circumstances. 

Tied together by the staff of the
RNICU, Bound Forever in Love

This blog, for the most part, has been an unedited revealing of myself. In anticipation of this day, I had spent some time working on what I would say on such an important milestone of my life. I thought I had it finished but I was surprised, overwhelmed, when I walked into the UAB RNICU today. Here is another picture diary of what I experienced. 

My Nurse Manager, Donna Purvis, who made working with cancer a possiblilty.

Page Paradise who will never let me stop fighting!

Christie Campbell who introduced me to "The Faces of Cancer"
A calendar constructed to raise money for research and awareness.

Jennifer and Chrisie, a smiling face and a comforting word were always there when I needed it.

This sign read "Happy 1st Anniversary Juliet! Not just another Survivor - Our Hero"
Really.... They are mine!

I can't believe it! I'm a grape!!!!
Toni, you can finally retire.

That face says, how could I ever thank you enough

Susan, Mama Sue! Always supportive, loving, and full of hugs!

Hoping that one day Carcinoid Cancer will be a ghost of the past

Thanks Jeff, you always make a day at work easier.

Lynette, a woman of many talents. Thank you for the
great cake and the heart-warming signs. I'll never forget
this day!

Kerri Alecia, thanks for helping with the details
during my leave. You are special to me, to all of us.

Tatayana, you are #1 in my book, no matter
what language you're speaking!
Denise, thank you and I still use my Garmin
to get me where I need to go.

Melissa, Marla, and Lyndsey! Your prayers and letters
helped me fight on hard days!

Nancy and Helen, there is nothing more warm than
your genuine smile and concern for me.

Andrea, Felicia, Angie, Amanda, Stephanie!
I've loved watching all of you grow into
amazing nurses.
 " If hope is born of suffering, if this is only the beginning,if there is no sudden healing...This is what it means to be held, how it feels when the sacred is torn from your life and you survive. This is what it means to be loved and to know, the promise was .... that when everything fell, We'd be held."  

My dear precious family .... thank you for holding me.

To Hurried to Heal

Recently I had a candid discussion with my doctor. In discussing my current disease state and prognosis the medical advise was to "Be strong. Create a mental toughness that allows you to experience some freedom from cancer." At first, I was kind of offended. I thought .... what do you mean, "be strong, mentally tough"... I have been. I am usually my worse critic. I immediately started thinking of how I could be stronger. What could I do to achieve the mental toughness that could create a "mind over matter" and beat cancer. Not just to create "some" freedom from cancer, but compete freedom. I talked to the wisest woman I know ... Mama! She said, "Sometimes you have to be weak and in doing so you find strength. Julie, you need to stop trying to be so strong. Take the time you need to heal. Lay down, take a nap when you don't feel good. It's ok. Don't feel like you just always have to keep going." Taking all that in I realized that I'd been to hurried to heal. It was time to slow down. I don't believe that God causes bad or unfortunate events in our lives. I believe that God is all good, all the time. He promises to bring good from evil and  He just proved it again in my life. I was rear- ended in a recent car accident and it broke my collar bone. I had to slow down and I believe it has been good for me.

I recently stumbled upon a wall of portraits. Mama and I were looking for a quiet place to sit while I waited for another dose of poison to work its way through my cells. As we made our way down a long hallway we began reading the stories of the people in those portraits. Each one seemed familiar to me. I felt like I knew them. I would go to the next picture and again, the same response. I knew these women. There stories were similar. There messages familiar. 

" Don't let fear paralyze you" from a woman prepared to fight, researching her enemy and planning her attack. 

"Fight like hell and know that you are not alone." The message from a woman who knows the power of the Great Physician. Who asked, just like me....do I have a fighting chance....I want to see my boys grow up.

"Let your family be there for you. Don't push them away." Her husband spoke of her determination. During chemotherapy she kept playing softball. He watched her make a hit, long and hard. As she rounded second base her knees started to give and he knew she was fighting hard to keep going. She went down, but just for a second.

" You're going to live. It's not the end of the world." The message from a strong woman, active as a writer and a mother. She too believes in angels. Her heart is powerful, as is her voice, trusting herself, listening to her body, being persistent and sometimes insistent, she keeps her weapons sharp.

As I walked back down this wall decorated with beauty and strength, they all seemed to smile at me. Their message, we've been where you are and we beat this....you will too.

A day in the life of a Survivor

"From the time of discovery and for the balance of life, an individual diagnosed with cancer is a survivor"

The NCCS (National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship) put forth this definition of 'survivor' in 1986. A time when cancer was a disease people needed to learn to fight. All my hopes, expectations, attitudes and actions didn't change the fact that I became a cancer patient. What I have been able to do, from the moment of diagnosis on, has been to take steps to make my life the best it could possibly be under the circumstances. I was... I am... thankful for this term, survivor, that kept me from ever feeling like a victim...the most commonly used term for people with cancer. Labels speak volumes about who we are and how we see ourselves. Surviving for me is about embracing your life ... no matter the circumstances ... and finding some happiness today while hoping for a better tomorrow.

Carcinoid is rare -- and nobody -- not even the experts, really understand it. The medical mystery behind this zebra has yet to be solved. This past month in addition to increased pain and my usual nausea,  night sweats, day sweats, and extreme fatigue, I am having severe headaches and dizziness. Bending over to put a dish in the dishwasher can be hazardous ... I almost fell in! For now, it seems, these are just symptoms of Carcinoid that I will continue to face. Carcinoid scatters throughout organs like the esophagus, stomach, pancreas, intestines, liver, and lungs. It also causes valvular disease in the heart. At my last echocardiogram, all four of my heart valves have been affected. 1/3 of carcinoid deaths are a result of the failure of these valves. Reportedly food moves through the carcinoid patient 2-6 times faster than normal. Resulting in malabsorption and electrolyte imbalances. The dizziness is, no doubt, related to those imbalances. 

 "You look great"... I've heard this expression many times and I am just not sure how to respond. The thing is, pain for the most part is invisible, until it causes our facial features to contort, and our eyes and bodies grow weak from exhaustion. The truth is, every day activities have become mini battles. Little things that used to be non-issues are now my nemesis. Sleeping with a towel to soak up the sweat, scarfing down nausea pills, having to stop and rest---alot, little whimpers of pain that squeak out. Truth is ... I'm tired. But I am not defeated. Marvin Sapp has a song and the lyrics really spoke to me. I'd like to share them with all of you.

So glad I made it,

I made it through

In spite of the storm and rain, heartache and pain

I'm still alive declaring you

So if you see me cry

It's just a sign that I

am still alive.

In spite of calamity

He still has a plan for me

 it's working for my good and

 it's building my testimony.

I realize that this post may actually be gloomy. I would be dishonest though if I didn't share this part of the journey too. There are times when it's just hard to think positive. I'd like to be a  strong advocate for sick people. I'd like to always have the "right" attitude, but I don't. So on that note, to anyone working in the medical field who can make a difference. Uncomfortable, long waits in uncomfortable chairs, laying on a piece of paper, on a hard examining table wearing a paper gown is not therapeutic. The fact is, waiting rooms and doctors offices need interior decorators and entertainers.



After the rain, comes the sun

Something about watching a baby, who would fit in the palm of your hand, cling to life... challenges me to continue, to press on, to push through. I know that as I hold these babies in my hands, that God holds us all. Calling work early Sunday morning, to tell them I couldn't be there... I had to recite those encouraging words, "I know the plans I have for you, and they are good."  Tears flowed easily that morning and since.  It seems that the nausea and pain in my stomach are increasing daily. Though days are harder, I believe that just as sure as God has a purpose for the very complicated and often painful beginnings that many of my precious patients face... that there is also purpose for the trials in my life. Climbing those mountains enables us to really appreciate the beauty of our surroundings, but you don't get to see that until you summit the top. Then suddenly the climb is worth it.

It's raining outside today, and as I write tears are raining down my face. I don't know what exactly I might have to endure physically, what effect surgeries or treatments or medications might have on my already weakened body. I do know that leaving my boys again, not being able to perform my role as a neonatal nurse, stirs emotion to deep to even recite.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." So even when it hurts, even when it's hard, even when everything seems to fall apart ...  as I cough back the bile and flush the blood down the toilet, this zebra focuses on the most important thing ... He is Able, He alone is my Strength, my Shield. There is a reason and He makes all things good.


As I come to the corners of my life, I realize that though I can't see around them ... God can. Through love and sorrow, happiness and pain, I dare not forget whose child I am. So when it's dark and raining ... "this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine." Remembering that after the rain comes the sun.

From Calculating Tumor Markers to Marking the Calendars

After I backed out of my last scheduled scans and realized, I just couldn't do it. Well I could do it ... but I didn't want to do it. And, I had decided not to. I'll  try to explain why. 

Cancer takes things away from you at times when you... have other plans. There are those times when the dark skies are threatening rain, even though you've planned the most perfect picnic day. Worse, when you have something you've really looked forward to and that day, you wake up sick.

But this was a day all set aside for Cancer! A whole day for the thing that invaded my life and would will to take it. But this day, I didn't feel bad. I felt good. And any day that you feel good, you want to live it!
So!!! I surprised cancer once again. A day cancer thought it had me for sure...I changed my mind!!! and changed my plans!!!
 I did go to my oncologists office later that day to explain myself. And while she looked at me, puzzled, she responded with, "That's ok, we will reschedule... but I need to draw your tumor markers before you go."
  I skipped to the lab, gave my blood sacrifice, and drove home.
 I still felt good. I had a great day. I enjoyed being with my family...I sat with on the porch and laughed over tea.
Days pass and then results were in!

Tumor Markers Elevated.

I've spent some time listening. Listening for that still small voice to tell me what to do. What the next move is, the next doctor to trust. I've been raised in generations of doctors, I have a special place for them. But I realize, maybe at times more than they do, that they are human just like me. To trust them... with my life, would be to trust in vain. My trust is in the Lord. The One who created the doctor and gave him the passion to cure.

I am reminded today of something my doctor in Louisiana said. "This isn't a race ... I'm not just running for cancer... I'll crawl for a cure." 

I have given up alot already to this disease. The one thing I refuse to do, is to give up my good days. Today I laughed watching old home movies of the boys. Watching turtles eat worms and seeing those little boy faces, hearing those precious voices...those were good times. Watching the boys laugh at themselves made today a good day.
 I refuse to race through my life. I want to take my time, in whatever quantity, and soak it up. I want to remember to treasure all those moments. So that on that "sick" day, I can think about those good times and what I have to look forward too.
When you have a diagnosis of cancer, quickly cancers voice can be very loud, drowning out sometimes even your own. There is a moment when you reclaim it. When it's time to turn down the volume and talk back. Some days you need to reschedule and take that time to enjoy the life that is yours.

I am really excited about an event I've been asked to be apart of. A calendar to raise awareness is being created. Women with all types of cancers, at all stages of life, are being featured. The proceeds from the calendar will go to cancer research and to aid families with expenses. I will be photographed and interviewed later this month. I am honored and excited.  

Some days are diamonds!

We made it ...Graduation 2012



 When I first started writing my blog, initially it was a way to share information about my rare cancer with family, friends, and co-workers. I had no idea how sharing my un-edited self would help me deal with this disease. What surprised me even more was how others have been interested in what I have to say. I am incredibly grateful for the amazing support this blog has provided me. I am pleasantly surprised and thankful that the blog is being seen literally around the world. Currently there are views from Germany, United Kingdom, Canada, Russia, Australia, Philippines, Japan, Latvia, United Arab Emirates, Honduras, Greece, Guatemala, Malasia, Ukraine and France! Wow!


I am still fighting symptoms, but I met another goal. I was able to return to work! What a sense of accomplishment for me. I felt like I had given Cancer another swift kick with a message: Still fighting...and still winning!

So happy to have Mana here.

Joseph Campbell said "Life is without meaning. You bring meaning to it. The meaning of life is whatever you ascribe it to be. Being alive is the meaning." "Meaning" to my life comes in so many different ways; hugs from the nurses (friends...sisters) that I work with, moments with my children... like when my son Jordan said, (when asked how he was dealing with things) "My Mom is like my best friend, and if something happened to her, I don't know what I'd do"...slowly those worried faces are smiling more. Perhaps the greatest testament to my life is the fact that I can take a breath, that I am smiling and have lived to see the depth of love and care that I have been shown by so many. Hope always lived inside me, but in all of you it found it's wings.

Sometimes I feel like I hear a kitchen timer in my heart, ticking down the days - hours - seconds until my next surgery, or MRI, or CT, or OS - or any other medical acronym that brings with it paper gowns and poisoned injections. My younger body was riddled with scars. I was always active riding horses or building pyramids in cheerleading. Most of them are at least 25 years old and have faded so they aren't noticeable. Now my body has a new scar. It's a strange alien-like thumbprint from my sternum to my pubic bone. To an outsider, the scar may not seem like much -- but for me, it has some strange mystical power. It's a reminder of how my body was taken from me for a while. I still haven't gotten it all back, but I'm making progress. My most recent scans revealed a place in my right lung and another in my colon. I return to Ocshner in July.


Every day my energy and passion are restored
My hope, renewed and replenished.
I'll keep moving forward, until it is finished.
Keep on fighting until there's a cure, 
for me there is only one answer...
To live in a world where no one hears, the words...   "you have cancer".

These Days...

That's the container that holds the syringe, used to protect everyone from the solution inside it.
But then they inject that into me!

Eat nothing for 15 hours... now drink these warm cocktails made just for you. Bottoms up!

Those square things rotate and stay about a half inch away from your body for about 2 hours. While you lay perfectly still. Imagine how your nose itches when you can't scratch it! Not to mention, when you become the sandwich, no one wants to hear that the machine has been getting stuck.

All this in one day! Day two is more of the same! And then those days determining the next day!



I am feeling better every day. I continue to fight symptoms. I thank God for the many mercies and the rich blessings of life. I am gracious to have received both. My life is delightfully rich made so by all of you. You are the rare steel magnolias. The survivors of a disease that discriminates not against any race, religion, gender or age. It cares not what you wanted to do today or what you had planned for your future. It strikes and there is you, feeling the weight of uncertainty of what-if's but then suddenly there are those who rally around to say, when you need to cry, I'm here, when you're scared to death, take my hand I'll lead you through it. Because as optimistic as one wants to be, those days come. Those moments dawn in your life and every prayer counts, every remembrance of me, and others who have a difficult path... you are heard, it matters, and you make all the difference in the world. 

Life Is DuVine

Remission 

the state of absence of disease activity in patients with a chronic illness, with the possibility of return of disease activity. Remission refers to the response of a cancer to treatment. It does not mean that a cancer is cured.


                     Remission to me...

It feels like freedom. If feels like water, when you're so thirsty. It feels like fresh clean air, when you need  a deep breath. It feels like sun that warms you on a cool day,,,it's that warm blanket from the dryer when you're cold. It's a revival of the human spirit,,,to make you want life back,,,to fight even harder for it,,,to never give up,,,never give in.    

Remission to me looks like 

Friends from DuVine sent me this jersey. The day I got it was one of those "sick" days...it was just the encouragement I needed to stay focused. To remember that I would feel the sun on my face again, and I'd be able to lift my own arms. So  thank-you to DuVine for walking along with me on this journey too. 

God, just a prayer away...no matter where you are. "Weeping may endure for a night, but the morning will bring joy, he wont give you more than you can bare."
 I was never alone. 

LSU Surgical Oncology and Endocrine Surgery is top of the class.

According to Dr. Boudreaux, Dr. Woltering, and Dr Wang, "You are 1 of the lucky ones". 

Will it come back? "yes" .... who knows when though! Am I more likely now to develop some other type of cancer? "yes"....  probably colon or pelvis .... 

Which brings me back to the beginning.

 Statistics are just calculated odds, and people beat them all the time. 

And Today, I DID! 

Today, there is no evidence of carcinoid tumor in my body! My doctors, who feel more now... like family, will continue diligently to treat the symptoms of carcinoid syndrome. Frequent scans and blood draws to scout for tumor markers will alert us to anything new. All those in my herd who circled around me will be ready to fight again and will be on guard! On October 21, 2011, I had carcinoid cancer. On March, 21, 2012, I am in remission from carcinoid cancer. 

  

Dream Big, Work Hard, Have Faith

Been a long hard ride, there's still a long rode home, but I'm on my way back to ME!

This picture was taking in 2008, another time in my life that I had to fight through obstacles, climb a mountain that I believed to be insurmountable. But...as for me.... I might die tryin, but I don't give up. I've always loved these animals. Horses have always been my escape, my passion. YeHah! to the day I get to ride again.

Dream Big, Work Hard, Have Faith

So next week is one of those that I can't help but worry about, but in no way can I change.  I will be re-staged! (In words we all understand!!!) Staging begins at 0 and goes to.... complete your "Bucket List" (one of my favorite movies). I know the news I want to hear... but I have comfort, whatever the news,,,, I'm not riding any faster than my guardian angel can fly!

“You were given life; it is your duty (and also your entitlement as a human being) to find something beautiful within life, no matter how slight.” ― Elizabeth Gilbert  

It's not always easy to see that "beauty within life." Reading the above quote made me think about it differently. "Entitlement"... I'd never equated being entitled to finding something beautiful. But I liked it! There are times when we look back on events of our lives when we were grieving, deeply hurt, perhaps unfairly challenged, mourning, maybe even a heart broken, but our life was changing. Carcinoid taught me to see the beauty in all of them, because in some way, all of them, reminded me that I AM LIVING, and in living I was entitled to experience more of this life and of God's magnificent beauty.

He is the Potter, I am the Clay

According to my doctors, I am running about 2 weeks ahead of schedule. According to me, I am about 2 weeks behind where I'd like to be. Guess that means I am right where I should be! Wow... how wonderful to be right where God wants you. I'll be the first to stand up and admit, I'm not always, haven't been always, and never will always, be right on the path that God desires for me. But it sure is a good feeling inside when you know you are right where He's led you. What a blessing. It happened to me when I held my sons for the first time. The day I embraced my Maw-Maw like it was the last time ... because it was. The day I realized the depth of my Mother's love for me, and knew that in her arms was the safest place in the world. As weak as I feel, as difficult the pain, as horrifying the appearance in the mirror, I feel content with knowing He's concerned, He's here, I'm stronger because of cancer. 


My face has been smiling at full capacity this past couple weeks. My baby... Jordan turned 14. My first born... Austin ran and finished the Mercedes Marathon. Both achievements left me with a heart of gratitude. How awesome to be alive. To be able to see the achievements of my children. There hugs have never felt better. There smiles have never brightened my day more. I am a new person because of cancer.


I continue to receive notes and messages that uplift me daily from all of you. I really never knew how many friends I had. I regret that many people really never know how they are cared for. Some walk through life feeling so lonely and as a result...empty. The old adage "Don't wait till the funeral to send the flowers"... I am more whole and more thankful because of cancer.


I'm stronger, I'm a new person, I'm more whole and more thankful from a disease that in moments brings you to your weakest, not yourself, your most broken and at times bitter.


This is more than a race to finish ... it's a daily ...no, it's a moment to moment journey, into the most vulnerable parts of humanity. I am where God wants me to be. 


He is the potter, I am the clay, 
He molds and He makes me better every day.
With Him on my side, I've nothing to fear,
I rest in His arms, He catches my tears.
He knew what October would bring in my life,
He guided the surgeons who would hold the knife.
He placed in my path the people who'd care,
Those to remind me they'd always be there.
I'll fight cancer with mind, body and soul, standing boldly, for it is His hand I hold.

Austin ran the Mercedes Benz marathon, 26.2 miles, in just over 4 hours. He finished...so will I.

This blog has been viewed from the United States, to Honduras, to Russia, to Guatemala, to Germany, to Belgium, to Brazil, to France, to India, and South Korea. Thank You all for reading. Thank You all for caring so deeply. <3

If our God is for us, then what could ever stop us...

Little Friends to Keep Me Company

Coming home, seeing my boys for the first time in weeks, and then taking a look at myself in the mirror...  I decided to look past the not so pleasing exterior and look deeper at what I had learned about the person starring back at me. I took a moment to remember defining moments of this experience. I hope to write about many of them, I want to share each step with all of you. But some of this, quite frankly is to fresh, to raw, to even relive for long enough to write it down right now. So many times in life we go through the motions. When we see others go through hard times, even tragedies, we ask, How do you do it? The response is often, "you do what you have to do". I believe that we navigate the journey of pain, of unknowns, of hardship, by sometimes doing just that. We don't really think about it, we just do it. For me, while I have been aware of the obstacles that cancer placed in my path, and while I decided consciously to fight it, coming home in some way made it... reality. This had happened to me and I had beaten it! It was a moment when my conscious and that phenomenon where you are sort of outside your body looking in, were completely united. I was humbled and proud. 


We all face troubled times. Consider what Paul said, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." This was what got me through. I didn't throw my hands up shouting, what's the use...I can't beat this thing... too much to endure. I didn't roll over, pull covers up over my head and tell the world to kiss the moon. I with the rest of my "herd" decided to embrace this zebra cancer and run the race to win. There are always troubles in this life and the question is what kind of person are you. A "roll over and quit" person, a "go through the motions" person, or do you expect a victory, a success, a triumphant outcome to whatever you are facing? 


Cancer had always been a bad word, that had affected me, but hadn't attacked me personally. My strongest and most bitter taste had been watching its effects on my grandmother. Maw-Maw fought too. I can't help but believe that she has also been one that I have tagged when I needed a time-out from wrestling. Cancer is a strong opponent... but I've made up my mind and I will not be defeated. I CAN do all things, through CHRIST, who strengthens me. I am not going down, I am going up and coming through. I feel stronger everyday. I walk further everyday. I have fewer days when in bed or in the bathroom! 


I am walking in perfect peace. I know that while cancer is life changing, it does not define who I am. I have joy and a fervor for life that is deeper than I have ever had. From Steel Magnolias, "That which does not kill us makes us stronger" well... I am... stronger than ever!

Weeping may endure for a night, but the morning will bring joy... I am winning this war.

Going back to Ocshner next week. As always, thanks for reading and thank you for your prayers.

We all fall down

We all fall down... having people around to help you get back up... well, it just doesn't get any better than that. I've made alot of deals with God...He's always kept His promises. One I'd like to thank Him for blessing me with...YOU. I've experienced His mercy, His grace, His strength. I've seen God over and over through the people he has placed in my path. People who haven't given up on me. There is still a ways to go... but being remembered by you... who's love has helped me believe that when it's all said and done,  I have already won. 

 I am seeing more hair that decided to take it's on vacation. Lucky for me, I've got alot of it. Right now the sides kind of make-up for the back. Mama hadn't blown my hair dry in probably about 26 years, it felt good to have her do it again. Funny, Mama raised my sister and I to be strong...independent, but during a time when I needed help with everything you can imagine...I was secure in her arms. 

Looking around the Hope Lodge, I could see how lonely this journey can be. Lucky, I've had someone to hold my hand, literally every step of the way.  Mama, Aunt Bonnie...physically here. Friends around the world, sisters and brothers in the UAB-RNICU...Page who has checked on me daily...my sister Jenny...all of you who have prayed, here in spirit. I have never had to feel alone. This site has had close to 4000 views now. I am overwhelmed, to know that you have believed in me...miles away, but close.

Had a bad day! Dehydrated. 

My incision is healing and the bruises are beginning to fade. Weary from the journey, but I am pressing on.  Recent CT scan shows a small area that may be infection, we will watch it close. Not losing any sleep over that! I can beat cancer... infection, isn't gonna get me down. Just another bridge to cross. Right now I see blue skies outside, cancer is becoming a fading memory. 

Mama sat in the waiting room during my surgery, Dr Boudreaux had news for another family. A lady with the same diagnosis as mine. Carcinoid hadn't reared it's ugly head for 6 years. Now, she was in surgery, and there was little that could be done. Mama recounted to me how crushing the news was for her husband, others there that loved her. I don't know her whole history, but I do know that we all desperately cling to life. I'd ask that all of you who have prayed for me to add her to your list. Pray for those who are giving there lives to find a cure for this cancer. My Maw-Maw said, "I am not dying from cancer... I am living with cancer." Maw-Maw always had a way of seeing the sunshine through the clouds. My happiness and peace of mind comes in part from knowing that not one piece of the war is in vain. At times when the silver lining is hard to find, inside I believe one thing is plain to see...God is Soverign over all. 

I was asked recently to publish an article to help others who are fighting cancer. The article stresses the importance of nutrition and exercise. I've lost 14 pounds now and know that eating the right foods is necessary. Thanks for reading.

Lifestyle Changes to Fight Cancer written by David Haas an advocate for those fighting cancer

Lifestyle changes such as a healthier diet and more physical fitness are common New Year’s resolutions; just about everyone resolves to work out more, exercise smarter and better and eat right. People view the New Year as a new start and therefore tend to make their resolutions then. However, there is no time like the present to make the resolution to get more exercise, especially if you have cancer and are undergoing mesothelioma treatment to fight your cancer.

Your doctor will tell you that the best thing you can do while undergoing cancer treatments is to make major lifestyle changes. Get more exercise and eat better are the top two changes on his list. The reason your doctor wants you to do this is probably less out of vanity than your reasons for wanting to do this, but the end goal is the same: to be healthy and happy.

Cancer treatment takes a lot out of a person; the chemicals that are pushed into your body are difficult on you; you will become tired, withdrawn and often weak. Your body needs as much strength as possible to help you deal with this, to give you more energy and to adapt to the treatment in a way that lets you live a life with more quality. Quality of life is so important when dealing with cancer. The most important aspect of exercise when it comes to dealing with cancer is your ability to fight the disease. Your immune system is negatively affected by your cancer; the stress of undergoing treatment and worrying about everything you worry about takes a toll on your immune system and it becomes less capable of fighting the cancer alongside your treatment. The positive hormones produced by exercise help to fight the negative effects that stress has on your immune system and allows you to build your immune system back up to help fight the disease. You will feel better; the treatment will not make you as tired and withdrawn as it would without regular exercise.

In addition, your body will become stronger. Your other organs and your muscles will become stronger, which makes you stronger. Your mind will become stronger because of the positive energy that exercise promotes; you will be in a better mood, which will allow you to better handle the stress you are under and you will be able to manage a better quality of life. Take this into consideration and make a lifestyle change for the better, today. Being diagnosed with cancer is no reason to give up; it is the best reason to jump start your life and make it as positive as possible through a healthy diet and exercise. 

Thanks David for this article and for your commitment to this cause.